Quiet Times & Little Changes

So here I am – again, after far too much time – but as it turns out, grad school sucks up a lot of time. However, as much time as it sucks up, I do need an outlet… lest I start randomly bursting into tears or becoming hysterical.

My first semester of my current program is at an end and I am happy that I a) survived and b) stuck with it. I am, however, taking a break on classes over the summer – I need some time to decompress and really assess how my schedule will work in the fall because this spring was brutal and I need to make some very serious lifestyle changes.

It’s difficult because I want to be with my family and friends all of the time – but I can’t. I’m learning that. Things cannot stay the same. I tried to maintain my life the same and all that did was make me feel constantly stressed out all. My sleeping has become increasingly erratic and my headaches have returned. My stress eating is off the chain. But I mean, I don’t want it to seem like I’ve been miserable – I love my program. Plus, I’m getting to know my new neighborhood (Columbia Heights/U Street, what what) and I’m kind of falling in love with everything from the dog parks to the 11^th street district to my new favorite coffee shop, the Blind Dog Café. Lee and I are settling nicely, and I’m really digging how much more space I have in my new apartment. I’m even – gasp! – having people over occasionally!!! So I have a few things to be grateful for and happy about.

One thing that I do really miss is the movies. I haven’t been in forever in months. What has become of me? However, the upside: this weekend, the Great Gatsby comes out in theaters and I’ll be there watching it, even if it means taking myself on a date. With most of my friends gone this weekend, it’ll be a good opportunity to just… relax. And I plan on doing just that.

I’ve been hanging out with myself more lately in the last couple of weeks and I think it’s been good for me to take a step back from a lot of things. While I don’t feel less stressed necessarily, I feel less… pressured. If that makes any sense.

I guess the catch is making sure that I'm not actually taking so much time by myself that I end up completely alone. I have a history of this and then I get a little too comfortable in the silence.

For now, I think I'm on the right track and I'm feeling good about where I'm at. Now to get back on a decent diet track....